David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
I think my greatest accomplishment today was probably using a bottle opener to get the cap off my fourth drink while holding the cat WITHOUT dropping him.
Oh god, what has my life become?
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Will you come get your son? He's using an old bike pump to help him fart the national anthem...
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