I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
