4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
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