just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Randomize
