I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
