Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
is it fun? or sober?
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
Randomize
