His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
