playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I was not drunk enough for that final.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
