what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
