should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
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