Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
