I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Randomize
