dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
