Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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