I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
i was so blacked out at my family party.. my mom gave markers to all my little cousins. i was tagged by 5 year olds.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
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