Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I need a burrito and a hug.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
