The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
