It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize
