so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Also, my phone suggested the phrase “puke in the mailbox" how many times have I had the need to text that to people?
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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