Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
