Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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