I'm gonna have a badass scar
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
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