Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
Randomize