some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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