Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
