Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Your topless pictures make me question reality
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
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