yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Randomize
