Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
