I wanna passion pit in your ass
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
Holy sore nipples Batman
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
