I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize