Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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