roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
