I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Randomize
