Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Randomize
