Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
