I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
