I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Randomize