Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
