matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
