Please don't use social media to get back at me.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
Randomize
