just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
