im drinking this country out of the recession.
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
