Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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