If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
