while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
Randomize
