Holy shit! This guy had his hands and feet handcuffed and was scooting across the interstate and we almost hit him because it was so dark. I hate Louisiana.
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
