"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
