All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
The ass gains better be worth it
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
