i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
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