To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
Randomize
